he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
