I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Randomize
