next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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