I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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