That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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