saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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