Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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