I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
