he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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