I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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