he shaved USA in his pubs
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
