Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
i think my cat just said my name.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
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