Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
