Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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