I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
