just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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