I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize