haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Who wears a wallet chain?!
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
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