Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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