wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
