its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
