you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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