We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
