Pappa wants mamma naked
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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