shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize