I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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