By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
