yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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