would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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