She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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