I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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