I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
