She's JV to your varsity
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
