there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
