I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
