Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
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I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
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I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Never joke about your clitoris.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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