I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
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