Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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