i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.