Where is the hickey?
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
These Are 23 Of The Most Uncomfortable Questions You Can Ask
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
The 17 Most Horrible Things Said To Online Daters
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.