Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(281): View more from Texas

so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?

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(281): so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad? http://tfl.nu/ttkx

Replies (18) Good night (1220) Bad night (4976)
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(870): View more from Arkansas

I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..

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(870): I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance.. http://tfl.nu/o07j

Replies (9) Good night (4537) Bad night (552)
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(845): View more from New York

I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring

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(845): I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring http://tfl.nu/cvji

Replies (16) Good night (682) Bad night (4810)
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(352): View more from Florida

I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.

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(352): I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way. http://tfl.nu/qonl

Replies (34) Good night (6044) Bad night (2203)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years

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(609): It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years http://tfl.nu/cjjj

Replies (27) Good night (8531) Bad night (1611)
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(330): View more from Ohio

Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.

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(330): Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered. http://tfl.nu/lz30

Replies (8) Good night (505) Bad night (1211)
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(917): View more from New York City

sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.

(917): View more from New York City

that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.

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(917): sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride. (917): that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks. http://tfl.nu/bp4f

Replies (3) Good night (1545) Bad night (489)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.

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(203): Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend. http://tfl.nu/ouub

Replies (14) Good night (2378) Bad night (823)
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(716): View more from New York

It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving

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(716): It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving http://tfl.nu/l18z

Replies (1) Good night (1200) Bad night (452)
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(904): View more from Florida

I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am

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(904): I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am http://tfl.nu/dm8p

Replies (9) Good night (2112) Bad night (520)
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(505): View more from New Mexico

Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.

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(505): Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play. http://tfl.nu/a8rl

Replies (6) Good night (412) Bad night (949)
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(720): View more from Colorado

Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.

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(720): Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay. http://tfl.nu/q60w

Replies (1) Good night (903) Bad night (285)
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(510): View more from California

Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me

(206): View more from Washington

That is an interesting fear as well as image

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(510): Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me (206): That is an interesting fear as well as image http://tfl.nu/r0xy

Replies (2) Good night (419) Bad night (443)
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(636): View more from Missouri

I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.

(636): View more from Missouri

And then audibly agreed

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(636): I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate. (636): And then audibly agreed http://tfl.nu/3qg2

Replies (6) Good night (895) Bad night (289)
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(775): View more from Nevada

I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.

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(775): I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot. http://tfl.nu/46g7

Replies (3) Good night (445) Bad night (262)

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