I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Farmville is her only friend.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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