Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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