Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
