Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
