did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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