I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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