I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Text me some of your sweat
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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