So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
