Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Randomize
