We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Randomize
