have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize